Today, most Fathers want to participate in
birth classes, prenatal visits and in the delivery suite.
Sometimes expectations of his role as a “Labor Coach” may
be difficult to fulfill and sometimes culturally it is
inappropriate for expectant Fathers to be so intimately
involved in the process of labor and birth.
The Father to be is expected to become
familiar with the process and language of birth, to understand
medical procedures and hospital protocols and advocate for his
partner in an environment he is unfamiliar with.
A Doula can provide the information for the
parents to make appropriate decisions and facilitate
communication between the laboring woman, her partner and
medical care providers.
A Father may react anxiously to the mother’s
instinctive behavior to the normal process of birth. He may, understandably,
become distressed to witness his partner
in pain. The Doula can be reassuring and skillfully help a
mother cope with labor pain in her unique way. The
Father-to-be may need to accompany his partner to surgery
should a cesarean become necessary. Not all Fathers can
realistically be expected to “coach” during this intense
level.
Many Fathers are eager to be involved during
the labor and birth. Others, no less loving or committed to
their partner’s well being, find it difficult to deal with
unfamiliar situations. With a Doula, a Father can share in the
birth at a level he feels most comfortable with. The Doula’s
skills and knowledge can help him feel more relaxed. If the
Father wants to provide physical comfort such as a back
massage, change of positions, or to help his partner to stay
focused during contractions, the Doula can help guide him by
making suggestions for what might work best.
Childbirth is an emotional and spiritual
experience with long-term impact on a woman’s personal well
being. A Doula is constantly aware that the mother and her
partner will remember this experience throughout their lives.
By ‘mothering the mother” during childbirth, the Doula
supports the parents in having a positive and memorable birth
experience.
The Father’s presence and loving support
in childbirth is comforting and reassuring. The love he
shares with the mother and his child, his need to nurture
and protect his family, are priceless gifts that only he can
provide. With her partner and a Doula at her birth, a mother
can have the best of both worlds; her partner’s loving
care and attention and the Doula’s experience, expertise
and guidance in childbirth.
